Do Something HELPful - May 2021
Small actions can make a big difference, so HELP Auckland is challenging Aucklanders to Do Something HELPful during the month of May and raise vital funds for HELP Auckland. 

​Participants pledge to Do Something HELPful during May - for themselves, their family, workplace, community or environment. They ask friends and whānau and sponsor them through an online funding platform - and raise vital funds for HELP Auckland.

1 in 4 girls and 1 in 7 boys may be sexually abused by adulthood. It’s time to do something about it  - sign up to the Do Something HELPful challenge in May and HELP protect future generations from sexual abuse.

To be launched at our HELP & Soul event May 4th. Sign up now and you could win tickets to this event with Holly Smith and Tayla Alexander performing. 

​Sexual Violence Legislation to once again go before Parliament. We encourage all to approach their MPs in support of this legislation giving survivors a fairer trial. Opinion supplied
Paulette Benton-Greig, ex Help Auckland staff. The bill currently before Parliament will help complainants “feel more at ease, give clearer and better evidence, and be less harmed by the process”. Click here to read more. 

​Wellington Girls’ College student Lauren Hardie was recently sent home to change her clothes after endangering male teachers with her tank top. In much the same way as I threatened men and boys about 30 years ago, the 17-year-old dared to wear a top showing a bit of flesh, and was shamed for it. The difference between what happened to Lauren and me is she and her mates didn’t stand for it, and the school did the right thing. Eventually.
This story has an excellent video of students at the school talking about body shaming and dress coding. They express how they did not accept this!  Click here to read the story and view the video. We encourage you to share this on your social media!

After the challenges of COVID we finally managed to host our annual fundraiser 'Colour Me Purple'. Close to 100 people attended and it was a great night with Ali Mau as MC, The Fan Brigade comedy duo and Jan Hellrieger, singer and writer. 

Special thanks goes to our sponsors and auction suppliers Gilmours Mt Roskill, Jo Thompson our marvelous volunteer caterer, Ripe Deli, Farrah’s and Countdown Mt Eden. Wine and craft beer from Tantalus Estate Vineyard, Craggy Range, Soho wines, Planet Wine, Constellation Brands and The Garage Project. The flowers were done by Mt Eden Roses Florist. 

The Cottage at 108 the Pah and Mazda Auckland who supplied the main raffle prizes.  ​

​If you get most of your information about sex crimes from watching international television, you might have been shocked to hear that a 26-year-old Christchurch man just had his rape conviction squashed on the basis of warm and friendly text messages from the 13-year-old girl he was originally convicted of raping. 
 
Many of us would expect New Zealand to have a statutory rape law, meaning that consent could not be argued if the victim was under 16 years of age. But no such law exists here. 
 
The brutal reality of our current justice system is that the consequences for raping a child are much less than for raping an adult. While there are particular laws against sexual connection with a person under 16 or under 12, these carry much shorter sentences than a conviction for sexual violation such as rape.  Click on image below for the full story 

Kathryn McPhillips, Executive Director and Clinical Psychologist, addresses about how talking with a specialist counsellor who can guide you through the process of addressing the impacts of sexual abuse or assault, can assist you to moderate strong feelings, understand yourself, and re-process memories of the experience.

To watch the video click here. 

Two more videos on how to keep our children safe. Feel free to send these onto your communities. These are the last two videos of this series and all well worth watching. Click on photographs to view these videos. 

Kathryn McPhillips, Executive Director and Clinical Psychologist, talks about how to keep our children safer by building their resilience, giving them the skills from as young as 3 years to keep safer, and how to create a safer home environment.  
​Click here to view video. 

Do you shop online? Help us raise funds for free!
We’re on Rewardhub, a website where 100’s of leading brands Reward us with free donations, at no extra cost to you, when you shop online and are signed up to support us
It’s an easy place to shop with discounts on big brands in fashion, beauty, entertainment, travel, utilities, money, homeware, food, drink and more.
To learn more and sign up to our page, please visit https://rewardhub.co.nz/help-auckland

Understanding grooming is critical to stopping sexual abuse before it starts. Kathryn outlines how it happens, what you might see, and how you can disrupt it. Any talk of sexual abuse can be distressing, so if you need support, phone us on 0800 6231700 24/7

Click here to watch the video

​If you are interested.........................why do so many survivors blame themselves following sexual abuse or assault. Katherine McPhillips, Executive Director and Clinical Psychologist, gives another excellent talk on why people should not buy into victim blaming, why childhood abuse makes people more prone to self blame, why survivors often get confused or feel shame. Only YES means YES and only adults can give consent. Click here to view the video. 
#Yesmeansyes #notovictimblaming #sexualabusesurvivors

​If you're interested............................
Kathryn McPhillips, Executive Director and Clinical Psychologist, talks about a common question asked by people and the survivor "Why didn't she fight back?'. There are many factors that contribute here. Kathryn gives a very insightful response. Well worth listening to. #sexualabuse #sexualassault #survivorblaming
More questions for Kathryn email supporthelp@helpauckland.org.nz

Kathryn McPhillips, Clinical Psychologist and Executive Director of HELP Auckland, answers your questions. Today's question is "Why does it cut so deep?". As this is complex and different for each person we have given contact details and links to two poems which may help.
Send your questions to k.mcphillips@helpauckland.org.nz
If you need to talk to someone, phone 0800 623 1700, 24/7.
Poetry
https://peonymoon.wordpress.com/tag/marge-piercy-rape-poem/
​https://www.dearem.nz/empathise-archive/2020/ji6hj81jl5qi2thf0rz6vb11ftxdpf?fbclid=IwAR1ouy2ZFM9pWE_dy_lewYCp5Z-uvgFCBryof5_5KDcd9h9weaGCFcfg1V8

"If you are Interested" starting on Wednesday 8th April Kathryn McPhillips, Help Auckland's Executive Director and Clinical Psychologist, will be answering any questions that you may have about our services or just general advice on sexual abuse and sexual assault.
It is helpful for survivors and to end sexual violence, if people know more about it. But not everyone wants to know right now, so, just if you’re interested, we are going to be answering some common questions, and letting you know some things that survivors want you to know.
Recovery from the impacts of sexual violence are harmed or helped by the actions and attitudes of the people around you. So even if its happened, you can still make a difference.
#justask #questionsanswered #ifyouareinterested #advice #sexualabuseawareness
Please send us your questions to supporthelp@helpauckland.org.nz before Midnight each Monday.